Hosting your First Event

You have been entrusted or trusting yourself to host your first event! You have the vision, and you’re looking to find a process to a successful outcome.

In this blog, I share the process and phases I follow to remind me of my essential critical task: becoming a better communicator.

I still remember the day I surrendered my plans for a surprise go-away party for a friend. You get that feeling when you say, “I have done my very best,” or “it is finished.” My goal was to be as smooth as the Hollywood portraits of Jennifer Lopez in The Wedding Planner movie.

“Penny, send over the F.O.B.”

Seconds before the wedding is about to start, the wedding planner, played by Jennifer Lopez, sends her assistant, Penny, to get the Father of the Bride (F.O.B.) However, he was missing in action (M.I.A.) The wedding planner moves like a calm dove in a pond with quick feet to get the Father of the bride just in time to start the ceremony.

She “saves” the wedding.

What stands out the most to me is her proactivity, led by the art of her hospitality! To serve and to make memories! And as a reader of this blog, you know that productivity starts as a foundation. So let me start by saying congratulations on stepping into an arena that only a few choose to walk and thrive as a smooth dove.

You got this event!

Please bring out your favorite pen and paper and write down why you are hosting your first event. Freestyle, brainstorming, brain-releasing exercise, and we’re starting with your WHY and end outcome.

It begins with the end in mind.

This WHY is beyond the decorations, material things, and serving. Go deeper; what about decorations and servings that make you smile? What about your relationship with the bride or honoree? What are the feelings you’ll have after a successful outcome? Be unreasonable, be honest, and close your eyes.

Imagine! Open your wings, Superstar! Look outwardly and inwardly. Why? Because 9 out of 10 event planners beat themselves up, strive for perfection, and disappoint themselves during their process and outcome. Define what a successful outcome is to you in writing. Keep that note at hand. Hold on to it during the process.

Narrow it down to a powerful sentence 

We already know the “out of sight, out of mind” concept from previous blogs. Keep yourself grounded; planning an event can be overwhelming and stressful regardless of your preparations.

See the light at the end of the tunnel.

Please keep in mind that this blog serves as a guide to understanding the process of any events. I have narrowed it down to 4 phases. You get to choose your checklist items depending on the occasion. In other words, I am providing a blueprint; you fill in the details.

Phase I - The Resources

I have learned the hard way that resources are plentiful; the magic is in how you and I get to outsource for a smooth transition, so if you have a team, excellent! Let them pick what makes them excited and happy to do. I love getting answers like, “I’ll be an expert at that!”

That’s creating a win-win scenario.

If you’re running solo, I encourage you to ask yourself why. Challenge yourself to ask better questions and create a win-win for your family and friends. Step out of tradition, and ask what people love to do. Outsourcing is also on the people you rely on, such as venue reservations, boss/spouse meetings for the budget, catering, etc. Time to make the phone calls!

Phase II - The Timeline

Once your team has been assembled, you get to organize your timeline. I used to think that places and people needed to fit into my timeline. So it was chop chop, everyone! Which drove everyone around me crazy, and both parties were disappointed.

Hence, why do so many only work by themselves!

Your timeline is the benchmark you get to set from your deadline. So yes, the day of the event is your goal. However, the timeline is determined by the contribution of all the players. As the host and organizer, you get to follow up on what they promised. And please remember the following:

Follow-up is part of the job as a host!

Phase III - The Execution/Implementation

As the host and organizer of this event, you are the person that directs the traffic. Some people need whistling to hurry, some to slow down, and others to step on the break. If you don’t like the traffic analogy, think about it as a director of an orchestra. You get to lead every player and talent.

The key is in the follow-up. 

This includes phone calls, emails, or texts for confirmations and deliveries. You are ensuring their accountability without exhausting yourself. Letting them know about your future business motivates people to do their best. How enjoyable is ordering from the same catering company, designer, or photographer?

This includes volunteers

Imagine telling your church photographer you will pay her at the next event, depending on her communication and administration. And yes, it’s all about a paper trail; this is how we become great hosts and organizers.

Phase IV - The Celebration

I still remember my very first culminating event as an after-school director. A lesson, a regret, that still swims in my head. I was angry; I even remember myself trembling as I told my staff about my disappointment on, you guessed it, my timeline. The event was one-sided and not as a team based on strength and talent. I still see their faces, and it took months to regain trust.

One of the events I regret the most!

Since this event in 2007, I have been checking my gratitude meter and accountability responsibility. Celebrate all your wins, Superstar. And please make sure you share it with your team along the process. All these 4 phases are for rinse and repeat momentum to your event.

And especially at the end!

“Thank you!” goes a long way, and “Thank you, well done with _____” is even more impactful because it is specific and honest. I have been planning events for more than a decade, and I’m still growing. In recap, the 4 phases above serve as an important reminder of our # 1 responsibility:

Communication & Accountability

Jimmy, my husband, and I planned our wedding. And if we were to do it again, we would have hired a wedding planner months in advance instead of a month before our wedding day out of desperation and overwhelming fights. The wedding planner, played by Jeniffer Lopez, not only mastered her communication and proactivity; she fully trusts Penny, her assistant.

Even if your assistant is your 10-year-old daughter 

Identify her strengths and let her run with them! If you’re co-hosting, paying, or mentoring, do the same. We excel when we’re having fun in our strengths, the process is much smoother and enjoyable. 

And please move beyond gender or current roles. It’s not about their sex or current “positions.” Not everyone is sitting on the right seat of the bus in corporate America or the nonprofit, for that matter. Look at the spark in their eyes when you share the tasks needed for your event. Listen to what they say; go for “I’ll be an expert at that!” or “count me in!”

You create opportunities

As hosts and planners, we are fulfilling people’s SPARK and our honoree. Stay graceful by being thankful. It’s not faking it; it’s choosing and noticing what went well. Let me know of any other questions you may have. And as always, share this blog with a friend.

Love,

Me.