Reactive or Proactive Responses
Can we control other people? How about the weather? If your answers are “no,” “negative,” or “nope.” Let’s be friends! As a matter of fact, want to be my best friend?
This blog is about the root behind our reactive and proactive responses. Yes, yes, most of us have reactive responses at least in 1 or 2 areas of our life. Let’s explore how we can shift into more proactive responses to life, circumstances, and people.
I want to encourage us that the root of the responses is on based on the behavior, instead of character or personality trait. Similar to “Bad Behavior” vs. “Bad child.” We all get the opportunity to change it!
The concept of the 2 reactions was first introduced to me by reading “7 Habits of Highly Effective People.” Stephen R. Covey spends a great deal of time with Habit # 1 - Be Proactive by being responsible for ourselves.
“Response-ability” = The ability to choose your response
It is our personal responsibility to take care of ourselves first, then our children, spouses, teams, etc. This is the beginning of looking at ourselves before we focus on others. This is why we want to focus on our responses.
The behavior is the product of 2 things
1) Our Conditions: This includes your current feelings and mood (which are both true and valid) Current also means at the moment and top of mind.
2) Own Choice: This includes your core values and priorities. Core meaning that these have been with you since you were a child, or in other words, rooted.
Yes, the answer is the bottom. What is rooted and holds the most weight. This is why we get to tap into these subconscious thoughts to figure out our values and principles.
Values = “the regard that something is held to deserve; the importance, worth, or usefulness of something.”
Principles = “a fundamental truth or proposition that serves as the foundation for a system of belief or behavior or for a chain of reasoning.”
Prompt Journal Questions: What do you believe to be important to you? Are you role modeling it in your life right now? How can you align your daily activities to your values & principles?
Reflecting (journaling) is taking 2 steps back to remind ourselves why we do the things we do. Have you noticed that when you are clear on a project, the less you care about what others think? Being rooted in our values and principles takes daily reminders. Projects take time and have a process we get to experience.
The long journey path is less attractive and popular in society because we want quick fixes, and victories. Join me in embracing the valleys, the ups, and the downs. When (not if) negative circumstances and people walk in our life. Let us take 2 steps back to choose a response that leads to solutions and self-responsibility instead of blame-shifting.
As always, leave your comments below and share this blog with a friend.
Love,
Me
